You're Really Going to Ask Me That in an Interview? Part 1: Grad School Edition

By: Rachel Levy, Deputy Executive Director MAA @mathcirque

When I applied to graduate school I had a phone interview. The guy on the phone was friendly, and enthusiastic about my application. But at one point the conversation took an unanticipated turn. “So, tell me, exactly how old are you?” At that time, I was about a decade past my undergraduate studies. I had a master’s degree in education and plenty of work experience. And I knew that question was not legal.  

So I said, in my best, friendly voice, “Ummm, I think you can’t ask me that?” I held my breath and hoped I had not blown it. I certainly did not deter him, because he replied, “Oh, I know, but tell me anyway. I could always figure it out from your resume.”  My continued silence must have suggested I was less than delighted with his response, and so he continued, “I’m asking because I prefer older students. They tend to do really well here.” I was still speechless. Which may have been good, because he proceeded to offer me a fellowship, a “signing bonus” and said that none of it was contingent on working with him as my advisor. In the end, I attended that graduate school and had a terrific experience, while working with a different professor. But the shock of the interview stuck with me through the years.  

Not every graduate school interviews students, but some do, especially if there is a research assistant position or fellowship opportunity.  When interviews happen in person (such as during recruitment weekends), they may also include meals or social mixers. These less formal settings are also very much a part of an interview process, but sometimes the interviewer or interviewee forgets and the conversation strays to topics that are inappropriate or even illegal in an interview situation.

What kind of interview questions are illegal? Interviewees have the right not to discuss or disclose certain “protected” characteristics. Questions about those characteristics can be illegal under federal or state law. Searching online will reveal the list of protected characteristics in your jurisdiction, which can include race, color, religion, sex (including gender identity, sexual orientation, and pregnancy), age, national origin, disability, or arrest record. This means interviewers should also not ask about citizenship, marital status, or number of children you have. 

A search on “illegal interview questions” will provide you with lists of (sometimes subtle) questions that may have these characteristics at their core, such as the ubiquitous, “Where are you from?” that may be followed by the less subtle (and illegal), “I mean where are your parents from?” or “What country are you from?”

What interviewers can do is list all the requirements of the position and ask the applicant to verify in their written application that fulfills all the requirements. For example, some kinds of research work and funding (especially from government agencies and national labs) are associated with citizenship requirements.  

What if you are applying to graduate school, or even doing a campus visit after applying, and someone asks you an illegal interview question? It can be awkward to think of a good response on the spot. Here are three tips adapted from the Yale Office of Career Strategy:  

• Answer it, perhaps because you think the conversation will be useful to you. For example, if asked whether you have children, you could ask whether there are graduate students with children in the program.

• Side-step it, by changing the subject and talking about something you want to share concerning your capability for the position or institution. This may help address the questioner’s underlying curiosity or concern. For example, if you are asked about your family responsibilities or plans, you could respond with, “I understand the time commitment required for graduate school and I am ready to put in the time I need to do well.” or “I’d like to tell you more about the research I did last semester.”

• Question the relevance by politely asking the interviewer to connect the dots between the question and the position you are applying for. This may alert them to the inappropriateness of the question. For example, if asked about your age, you could respond. “Oh, are there age limitations in your program?” If changing the subject in this way is not possible, you may choose to refuse to answer, or simply end the interview. Or, as in my case, you could proceed with the interview and accept the offered position, but with caution and knowledge for the future about the individual who conducted the interview.

To prepare, think about which of the protected characteristics are relevant to you, and which characteristics other people may assume are relevant to you (whether or not they really are). Which ones would you choose to discuss, if they come up in an interview? Note that if you have an arrest record, it is worth reading up on options for responding to these types of questions, because the options can vary depending on the type of arrest.

Sometimes people bring up questions about family when they are talking about benefits.  Questions like “do you have a family?” or “Are you planning to have children?” may be well-intentioned, but they are not legal. You are welcome to bring up the subject, but remember that you can always discuss issues like benefits after an offer has been made and you are in the negotiation phase. Even for graduate school, benefits such as salary, type of position (RA/TA), travel, technology, summer opportunities, and where your office is located, may vary depending on who offers you a position, what types of positions are available, how the position is funded - and what you ask for. For example, some institutions make resources available to departments or individual faculty members to help recruit graduate students.

Even people who mean well, have been interviewing for decades, and think they know the rules, will, unfortunately, make mistakes. You don’t want the interviewer’s mistake to hurt your chances. Practicing answers to both legal and illegal questions in advance will help you navigate tricky waters under the additional stress of the interview situation. This practice can enable you to send the interviewer important signals when they veer into forbidden territory and continue the conversation in a calm, professional manner.

To practice interviewing, try playing the BIG Career Interview Game, which is relevant to graduate school interviews as well as for careers in business, industry, and government (BIG).  The game purposefully includes both legal and illegal questions, with tips from a human resources professional about how to answer each one. Enjoy!

Thanks to Abbe Herzig and Richard Laugesen for reviewing this post.